Listening, Doing and Dresses

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Friday, January 15, 2010

Woke up with a headache today, but stopped it before it turned into a migraine. I think I have a system pinned down! And, I must say, these have decreased considerably since I am not at Panasonic. My exercise and diet got a little out of wack during the Holidays, but I am getting back on track again. Need to drop carbs and sugars completely and get back on my routine of 3 workouts a week. That will have to wait a little until my ankle is back to normal, though.

Matt and I went back to Mucklow’s to talk to Mr. Mucklow about the rings. He said he would have more bands in on January. I must say, he is such a nice guy; certainly a person that loves his life, and his wife, and his work. There is something very warm about him and, because he really enjoys his work, he’ll take the time and energy to create something special. Matt and I feel very comfortable with him and are confident that he will create what we are looking for and for a fair price, so we have agreed to have him do the rings.

We spent a good 45 minutes to an hour there, looking at different possibilities for my band and we narrowed it down to two. We are going to think a little during the weekend about the design.

We will also return to see more bands for Matt as we didn’t find anything we really liked and Mr. Mucklow’s has received some more that are still not on display.

So that’s it for today, I would say a big step forward and it was an incredible romantic afternoon…

Thought of the day:

“Coincidences are God’s way of remaining anonymous.”

(Doris Lessing, Noble Prize-Winning Author)

Many times in life we get so stuck in the every day things that need to be done or in thoughts about that which worries us, that we forget to look beyond the evident. I have always wondered how many Devine messages we miss because we are not paying attention. They are out there, all we need is to pay attention.



It’s like the chain of little events that brought Matt and me together. And, hadn’t I listened to Cindy when she told me to call after we found his business card on my wind shield, who knows…

So, thank you for the reminder. And I promise to keep attentive my mind and heart so I don’t miss the messages…

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Gaby left me a voicemail asking if I could move the appointment at David’s Bridal to an earlier time so she can go. I called Grace and checked with her and then called the store and moved it to noon.

The thought in my calendar for the day is:

“If you don’t like the way the world is, you change it.

You have an obligation to change it. You just do it one step at a time.

(Marian Wright Edelman, Lawyer, Educator, and Activist)

I must say, I have been pretty much of this mind set my whole life. I have always thought, “Why do people complaint about things and do nothing to change them?” I think it is easier to wine about everything that is wrong rather than take the time to make things better. It also takes us away from our comfort level, and we know we are certainly used to that!


The sad thing with this is that, if we don’t risk change, we will never know what possibilities we missed. Many times I think of the many things that could have kept Matt and I apart, and staying in our comfortable zones would certainly have been one of them. Our paths would probably have not crossed if that had been the case.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Well, first round of wedding dresses! One thing is for sure, I don’t like shopping, I don’t like shopping for clothes, and I certainly don’t like trying on stuff that is white…

Anyway, Grace, Gaby and I met at my place and took off to David’s Bridal. When we got there, there was a million people at the store because of the sale they are having which ends tomorrow.

First, we looked for some dresses for Gaby. We pretty much pinned that one down fast. Gaby tried a couple of dresses on. Everything looked so nice on her! The one we liked was a full length “A” line and a little drape towards the side on the hip, in a beautiful wine color.

Then we moved to me. We started. One after the other, and the other, and the other…I tried on some puffy ones…don’t like them. Then we moved to some A lines. Uhh…not bad, but not it. We moved to some mermaid dresses and finally found two that kinda were there.

Gaby had left by 2:30 since she had to get back home. Grace and I kept going till about 5:00 pm. Drowned and in overdrive, we decided to go get a bite a Carrabas, which is right across the street.

We had a nice early dinner of antipasto, then tea, coffee and dessert. We got into one of our conversations where we discuss the world, its issues, life and all the things that we have shared over two decades of friendship. After fixing the world’s problems, we moved back to the wedding.

We glanced through a tux magazine and made a couple of selections for Matt ;-). Then we looked at the pics we had taken while trying out dresses. We both agreed that we need to go and look at more models.

On our way back home we went to look for a store we saw in one of the magazines since it is located in Peachtree City. It was closed but I will be calling to make and appointment as we liked what we saw in the windows.

This is going to take time and patience…

Today’s thought of the day:

“A lot of people are afraid to say what they want.

That’s why they don’t get what they want.”

(Madonna, Guinnes World Records’

most successful female recording artist of all time)

This is true at so many levels…Being a person quite shy in nature and having been brought up in a very formal and conservative environment, I had quite a difficult time learning to speak up and asking for my needs to be met. It took my moving to New York on my own to learn to stand up for myself and it was not an easy road.


I think this is a key factor for relationships not only to endure, but to grow and thrive. So many people bottle in their feelings and needs for so long, they end up resenting the other party because their needs are not met. And so many times the other individual is totally clueless to that fact. Magic thinking can be a very unhealthy and damaging thing in life and it serves no one well.


It does not mean that everything we ask for is miraculously going to be provided, it doesn’t even mean it is what we really want or need. But expressing ourselves certainly opens a dialogue and prevents those bottled up feelings from festering inside. (Of course, you also need that the other party be willing to listen.)


Probably, most importantly, prevents magic thinking from turning into an ever growing assuming monster that resents the other person because we think they don’t care…And, most of the time, we are so of base…

Castles in the Air

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Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Migraine morning, AUCH!!! Though, I have to say, this is my first one in more than three months…

I had to drive to Morrow early afternoon. On my way back, since I was literally next door, I stopped at David’s Bridal. They are having their $99.00 wedding gown sale so I though I would see what they had.

I usually get the core dresses for Voices and Zaphyra there. When I say core I mean I use them as the basis for something I end up altering and adding to.

Anyway, the sale ends next Monday, so I made an appointment for Sunday at 4:30 pm. Grace and Gaby will be coming with me and we will also look at Made of Honor dresses for Gabs.

PS Matt says I am overboard with sparkly, fiery things in my brain tonight!...

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Well, I am pretty upset…I will not get into any details as I do not want to hurt anybody’s feelings as mine have been hurt. Second bump in the wedding planning road, but I guess that’s life…

I will just say again, I am pretty pissed!!!

Thursday, January 14, 2010

I had my first coaching in to months today. It was one of my best sessions to date. I love my sessions with Kathryn. But don’t be fooled, she works me to the bone! ;-) We worked on Rusalka’s Song to the Moon, which I will be singing in this year’s Voices concert, Mist of Night and Moon, and Porgi amor, which I will probably won’t do ‘till next year’s season which there is a big chance will be “All Love Can Be.”

So, after a major vocal workout, I decided to go to Ikea and peek around. I love my new Garmin navi. It comes in so handy especially for such a disoriented one like me…

At Ikea I indulged and had a cinnamon bun. Those things are so yummy! (and brought one home for my honey, of course!) I walked around the whole place, and got a couple of nice ideas for wedding favors. Then, had to make it back home for lessons.

I have to say that Camille gives me some great surprises every now and then. She takes what I teach her and runs ten miles down the road with it; talent and passion, what a great combination!

Later in the evening, I was reading the calendar that Jeanne gave me for Christmas, “Believing in Ourselves.” Each day has a wonderful thought to ponder on. Today’s was:

“Don’t punish yourself for what others have done to you.

You’re better than them. You’re better than you think.”

(Mia Tyler, Model and Writer)

The calendar has an additional thought in the back of the previous day’s page. This one was:

“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost.

That is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.”

(Henry David Thoreau)

This made me think of a song a knew when I lived in Peru called “Castles in the Air” (http://popup.lala.com/popup/576742248792768015) -- OK, it just came to me, another Voices concert themed around this concept. And I just added a new playlist to my iPod… -- anyway, back on the subject…The chorus, translated from Spanish, is:

And he built castles in the air

In the sun, with cotton clouds

In a place where no one can go

Using reason.

And he built fabulous windows

Filled with light, magic and color

And he summoned the elf of things

That has much to do with love.

This is just a ruff translation and certainly not a poetic one, but I think it conveys the message. As an artist, sometimes I think about the creative process or, really, about creating, plain and simple. Much of it has to do with just letting go. Letting go of preconceptions, of that we have been taught should be, letting go of being able to physically grasp, and being open to the intuitive and listening with our eyes and seeing with our ears. 

No, I didn’t make a mistake. You have to be willing to go further and beyond, to be open to the possibilities and to the fact that those possibilities might not be agreeable to all those out there. Matt told me there other day that I am an idealist. He is probably right. He is too even though he is more pragmatic than I am. And I hope we both hold on to that part of ourselves beyond our deaths. Because I believe that in being so we chose to focus on the best that live has to offer. We choose to face challenges with hope and we chose to share how wonderful life can be.

We all know life is not easy. What would we really learn if it were a steady line? – which, if you think about it, would look very much like a flat line… Once in a while, we all probably need a crash cart stat and a jump start. And those are not pleasant, but they get the heart beating again. But knowing that we all will get our share of rough patches, why would anyone chose to make them an every day life event?

In old Greek civilization, people would study and try to embody an archetype, the conceptual idealization of a concept in perfection. They studied these archetypes and tried to learn from them and used them as guides for everyday life. As a result, they would open themselves to higher levels of inspiration and creativity.

Without access to that exalted state of vision we would all still be throwing stones and freezing in the night because we wouldn’t have discovered fire yet. Without it, Haiti would have no hope and would irrevocably drown in desperation and desolation. Without it, Matt and I might not have recognized The Gift that we have been given and would not have been willing to keep on looking for The Perfect Blossom.

So I choose to be an idealist, to build castles in the air -- even though sometimes I might feel they are made out of bubbles -- and to add the foundations they need to last for a very, very long time…

Oh, A Bad Step...

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Saturday, January 9, 2010

Today we got organized and took all the Christmas decorations down. We – or I should say “I” – don’t like to take them down until after Matt’s birthday and the “Visit of the Magi” on January 6, which is celebrated in Europe and South America.

Matt started early in the morning and then I continued. I had all the stuff in the appropriate boxes and was taking down the swags when, coming down from the ladder, I took a hard step down and messed up my ankle.

Couldn’t put my foot down to take a step so Matt came to help me. We waited about an hour and I still couldn’t walk so we took a ride to emergency at Piedmont. Thankfully, it ended up being just a bad sprain.

So, all other plans made for the day went out the window.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Today I had to move around with crutches. First time ever, but I just could not put any weight on my foot. For a moment there, I had crazy flash forwards of what it would be if I had to go through the wedding in them. Uhh….

Anyway, we finished putting all the Christmas stuff away and Matt worked organizing the garage. We spent some time discussing location possibilities once again. Couldn’t do much of anything else, especially since the internet was down. A tech should be here on Tuesday to check it out. ‘Till then, we are “incomunicado.”

Monday, January 11, 2010

My foot felt much better today. I took the stirrup off – it was driving me a bit crazy to tell the truth. But, into the afternoon, my foot started to protest by going back into pain mode. So, the stirrup came back on.

No internet still. Man! It is amazing how much our lives are tied to the web. Half of my life is online. Between email accounts, calendars, website, etc., etc., etc., I kinda felt my other leg was injured too!

We ended up going out to run some errands. We went to Five Guys and finally took some pics for Matt’s blog, a project he has had for a while now. But I will let him tell everybody know about it.

We also went to get some junk gold appraised as we will be using the funds towards our wedding rings. Matt and I decided to pull all these pieces from times afar together to get our rings done. What could be better to represent the experiences that made us the people we are today and the road that led to each other?

Anyway, the price per ounce was not as good as we expected, but it is starting to climb after about 5 weeks of decline. So, we’ll see…

Baby on the Way!

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Wednesday, January 6, 2009

Today was a calm day. Got a good night of sleep and then spent the day catching up with bills and paperwork. Spoke with Jeanne M. about how the things with Zaphyra are coming. Jeanne, I want to thank you for all your help with the plans. You keep me on track and I love our phone conversations. I can’t wait to meet you in person, hopefully before the wedding!
Mom was home today also and she prepared “Ceviche” and “Conchitas a la Parmesana” showing Matt how to prepare the recipes.
Matt and I talked a little about the location issue for the wedding, but we have not decided anything yet. I am pretty sure things will work out and fall into place when the time is right.
On a different note, we got a call from Cathy, Matt’s sister, in Hammond (Louisiana.) Little Matt’s baby has knocked on the door and is arriving! The whole clan is at the hospital so we are waiting for the arrival news. Cathy said that Madlynne Grace should arrive sometime after midnight.

Thursday, January 7, 2009

Baby Maddie – yes, we already gave her a nick name – arrived last night at about 3 am Atlanta time. Don’t ask me right now what is the difference with Hammond. I can barely remember my name ‘cause I stayed up last night waiting for the call telling us the baby was here. After calling Cathy to check, I finally went to bed a little after 1:30 am (I think) falling asleep some time around 3 am. Cathy called at about 4 am with the news. Baby Maddie had arrived at 9 lbs 10 oz! All is well in the world!!!

But, after that, I just could not get back to sleep, so I came to work on the music for the wedding. I had pretty much everything figured out but, since we have the location issue, some stuff needed to be reorged. So I shuffled things around a little and continued to work on getting all the paper copies printed.
Then I focused on getting all the lyrics for the music that is not published and marking what is sung with harmony, etc. Now I need to figure out the accompaniment and we should be in good shape to start rehearsals.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Well, baby, mom and daddy are doing great. Gaby and Maddie will be staying in the hospital ‘till Saturday, which is great. Matt and I will be visiting during the weekend of MLK’s Holiday and will also get the chance to meet Maddie’s little cousin Caleb who arrived in June. Can’t wait!
I tried to reach Father Joe again to see if he can officiate the wedding. I left him another message and sent him and email. Hopefully, we will hear from him soon.

Like many other people, we stayed home due to the snow. The roads are really covered with ice around here and, given the amount of accidents that have been taking place, we decided to be prudent and spend a nice, relaxed day inside.

We got to talking about the wedding, issue at hand being the location. We discussed different options but everything is in the air until we can figure out the issue about the ceremony. Matt is going to contact a friend to see what the options are.

CAKES AND BIRTHDAYS!

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Monday, January 4, 2009

So I have discovered Sylvia Weinstock, better known for the last thirty years as New York’s queen of wedding cakes. (Think Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones’ wedding.) This lady creates magnificent pieces of art at a certainly grand scale. All I can say is WOW! Just looking at one of cakes can be an experience or, as Matt put it, “a diabetic revelation” or “a temptation of death by sugar” through visual extravaganza.

I think we have pretty much figured out what we want. Of course, it is something unusual, a project in its own right, and it is to be seen if it is possible. But, then again, we don’t think within the bounds of what is standard or preconceived. That is certainly not us, is it?

We also found out that we cannot have an outside wedding as it is not allowed by the Catholic Church. I will leave it at that for the time being.
In the evening, we watched Gran Torino. Really good movie. If you have not seen it, you should check it out. Then, at midnight, we received Matt’s birthday…

Tuesday, January 5, 2009

Today is Matt’s birthday!!! I know, I know I already said it, but today is Matt’s birthday!!!
Bretty treated us to see Avatar as his gift for Matt. Guys, I am telling you, if you haven’t seen this movie, YOU MUST! It is groundbreaking in more ways than one. And talk about thought provoking. I will not get into the details ‘cause I do not want to ruin the experience for anybody. I don’t know if it will be as big, but I venture to say that “Avatar” will be to this decade what “Star Wars” was to the 70’s…It was the 70’s, wasn’t it? With a cost of $300M, the movie booked $900M on the first day! Wouldn’t you love to have the rate of return on some of your investments???

It was very thought provoking, addressing many issues as the abuse of power, the search for meaning in life, the universal interconnection of nature, trust, being able to see the true self of an individual and on, and on, and on. Nothing that has not been said before, but that certainly needs to be repeated over and over gain, maybe until it sinks into our conciousness and turns from thought provoking into action birthing. 

The music was perfect. One couldn’t expect less from a Horner score. Anyway, here is the link of the movie’s site: http://www.avatarmovie.com/index.html. Thanks Bretty, this was an awesome gift, but your sharing your dad’s birthday was the best gift of all!

Mom joined us to go to the movies and Brett joined us after dinner. We had skirt stake with sweet potatoes, kale, and portabella mushrooms. Yuumm! Matt cooked the skirt stake and I took care of the rest.

I was also finally able to get the recipe for Malba. Talk about a difficult strategic plan! But, Matt had requested it and so, it had to be done! (LOL) And I had to run back to the store two times ‘cause I kept on missing some of the ingredients. It didn’t come out as good as it should have been, but it was still pretty darn good! Yuumm again!

Happy Birthday honey! I love you forever!

Post Holiday Lingering

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Saturday, January 2, 2010

Today was a slow day. I could not sleep last night and so I was worthless during the day. During my long night of unrest, I almost talked myself out of writing the blog. I am a private person by nature and even though I am continuously on stage, it is my love of music and my creative soul which take me there, as I do not enjoy being the center of attention.

In the evening, Matt and I went to see New Moon. It was a little slow at the beginning, but I did enjoy the film and look forward to see what they come up with for the obviously upcoming second sequel.

I love watching movies, especially with Matt. I love us going to the movies and it always feels like we are home when we are together.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Matt and I had an argument this morning. More than anything else, it was caused because of the two ways that we process and share information. Matt tends to work out the details in his head, make a plan, and set his course.

I am very different. I start with an idea and the idea might continue to change as I discuss it. My creative process is pretty much the same. I start with something that evolves as the creating takes place.

Of course, we talked through it, as we always do. And we reminded ourselves one more time that we need to remember these kinds of differences so we are aware of the different situations.

In the afternoon, I concentrated on cleaning up my Outlook contacts. I started doing this when I left Panasonic, but wasn’t even through a third. With everything that will be going on, it is a must to have all information up-to-date. So, I dedicated all day to doing this. And, let me tell you, it took all day to get it done. I finally cleaned the contact list from 1,800 to 1,300. I corrected the information in each card file, etc., etc., etc., I can barely move my right hand at this moment, but I am so glad this is finally done. Now I need to update the distribution list in our group.

But, for today, I am done!!!

Happy New Decade!

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Wednesday, December 30, 2009

During my afternoon with Jeanne, yesterday, I had had the idea of both of us walking down the isle together. (As you can see, I look for that which has meaning for us, rather than the standards of tradition.)

It just seemed right to me because of how we had come together. When reviewing the music of the ceremony, though, listening to U2’s Miss Sarajevo, I changed my mind. Matt had been OK with idea; but, while listening to this song, I recalled the meaning for him and decided to go back to me walking down the isle, coming to him. And so I told him my thought and I think we are pretty much going to do this.

Now, we still need to settle on the location.

Thursday, December 31, 2009

We had decided to stay in today. We are more home bodies than anything else.

In the evening I asked Matt if we would take me for Japanese. So we went to Nikko’s and enjoyed a wonderful meal. After that, we went for desert, Malba, at Georgia Shrimp. Jill was working and so we sat at one of her tables. She is supposed to call me on Saturday with her schedule for the week as we need to get together to record with Amy and edit what we already have.

After desert, we came back home. We ended up watching Julie and Julia. At exactly midnight, Matt looked at me and said “Happy New Decade!” And, yes, it is not only a new year, but a new decade also.

Back to Julie and Julia, what an enchanting movie! And I can’t help to feel as happy and in love as Julia. As Matt said when we were watching the movie, “It all feels new again…”

Friday, January 1, 2009

So it’s the first day of the rest of the decade! I slept in this morning. When I woke up, Matt had already been up for a while and had a fire going. Mmmm…I love how the house smells when we have the fireplace going!

In the afternoon, I went out to look for sale bargains. As usual, one found me. I won’t get into details right now, ‘cause I want it to be a surprise for the wedding, but, as many other things, this one just took care of itself!
I had also been looking for pre-lit garlands, but did not find any where I went. I will keep on looking tomorrow. What I did find was Matt’s birthday present due on the 5th!